Guess who’s back?
Three months have passed since my last journal entry. I find it’s hard to write (or really create anything) when life starts to pick up. I really need to setting aside some time during the week to write, gather my thoughts, and work on my projects. A lot has happened in these last three months, but I’m finally starting to settle down again. As of this last week, I’ve fixed a couple of dead links n’ such on my site, and even made a few ads to go on the front page, here they are:
Going through some of the creative programs I’ve gathered over the years, I dusted off JuiceFX and found it actually works great for site assets and such. Easy transforms/animations and effects. The telephone blinking red, and my bouncing head were both done in it. I then exported the results and made the final ad in Aseprite.
The touch grass ad was pixelated and quantized to the DB32 pallet using pixatool, text added in Aseprite. I’m sure I could’ve achieved the same effect entirely within aseprite, but pixatool is my go-to for its ease of use.
My ultimate plan is to create some javascript that displays different ads on different days/times. My telephone ad could only play on the weekend (when im easily accessible), or I could have ads that correspond with broadcast times, or even change when i’m live on air directing people to the broadcast! the possibilities are endless, and it seems like a fun way to keep the site nice n dynamic. whatever that means.
How’s the last 3 months been?
Hectic and tiring, emotionally straining, and immensely freeing.
My grandfather is in hospice. Cancer is disintegrating part of his spine, he was in immense pain, but since being there, the morphine has been keeping him nice and comfortable, and his quality of life has massively improved. He’s actually going to be visiting us for a day this Halloween since he’s feeling good enough to do so, the whole house is looking forward to it. As sad and as hard as it is to have a family member in hospice, the nurses and doctors are so nice and everything seems to be happening the way it needs to. He’s comfy, we visit him often. Hell, he says it feels like a vacation! which is really nice to hear. We bring him two thermos full of freshly brewed coffee every time we see him, which he thoroughly enjoys. Once a week we’ll bring in-n-out as well and eat dinner together.
There was a falling out between my wife and my sister. A night out went horribly wrong, some issues in our relationship came to light, and we immediately began to work on our relationship, and ourselves. My wife began attending therapy and group DBT sessions, we began to eat better, live better, but seemingly, my sister was unable to move past it, and continued to act mean, cold, and hostile to my wife. It completely changed the mood in the house. There was tension, stress… Keep in mind at the same time this is going on, I’m trying to process what’s happening with my grandfather. I couldn’t take it, and neither could my wife. Enough was enough - I took out of my retirement, payed off our credit card debt, and put down on a travel trailer for us to live in.
It’s been about 1 and a half months in our new place — we’ve got rugs down, pictures hung, and we’re nice and settled in…There’s more to do - a proper 30 amp hookup, a gravel pad to sit it on further from the main house, and potable water. But we’re comfortable even on just 15 amps thru a standard 110v outlet. Our AC runs, our microwave works, we’ve got an electric fireplace that works…just none of it at the same time lol. I’ve got my desk set up, two monitors, my rotary phone sitting beside me…Our space is only ~250 sq. ft, but it’s more than enough for us…full size fridge, comfy couch, small but cozy bedroom. We literally couldn’t ask for more! I feel like the both of us lost site of what we needed or even wanted, and we’re finally back on track, living better than we ever did.
In retrospect, everything has been working out exactly as it needs to. I feel more like an adult now than ever. I’ve got my own home, a stable job, no high-interest debt looming over me, and Im properly medicated now. There will be challenges, but I’m adapting, growing, and frankly, thriving. It felt good writing this post, getting my thoughts out of my head and onto ‘paper’, and it felt good writing last time too. I’m gonna make an effort to work this into my life. Journaling rocks.
What now?
More art, more work on the website, more projects, more growth. The world is collapsing around us but that’s no reason to lay down and die. I will thrive, like a tree growing out of the pavement.
More to come, thanks to any soul who’s taken their time to read my ramblings. KP